Sunday, January 31, 2010

UTI's, or those pesky urinary tract infections

I used to get urinary tract infections a lot. Those can make the whole vajayjay area pretty darned uncomfortable! How can you use your vajayjay properly if you have that going on down there?

One day, as I was getting my 5th prescription for antibiotics at the doctor's office, a nurse told me to try cranberry pills. "Forget the juice," she said. "You need something more concentrated than that."

So I picked up some cranberry pills at my local drugstore, and took 3 of them before bed, along with a huge glass of water. The next day, I took 3 in the morning and 2 or 3 at night. It worked!

Whenever I felt something coming on, due to stress or maybe not drinking enough water, I would pop some of those beauties and rest.

Today, I've been reading all about rosehip tea. Apparently that's good for UTI's as well. If you're too lazy to click on that link: it says to drink 3-4 glasses of rosehip tea per day if you're suffering from a UTI.

Not only is it good for you, it's tasty! You can find rosehips in bulk at natural food stores, or look for them in herbal tea preparations. One of my favorites is Red Zinger, by Celestial Seasonings.

Have a wonderful day with your vajayjay and remember, drink your water! A moist vajayjay is a happy vajayjay.

Thursday, January 28, 2010

Embarrassing Problems

Sometimes women wonder, what's normal and what's not? Is my vajayjay healthy? What is that stuff on my panties?

Well, have no fear, vajayjay owners. There is a nifty site called EmbarrassingProblems.com, which will answer all of your vajayjay-related questions.

I like how they use the word, "knickers." Its sounds like a sports team, doesn't it? Panties is an okay word, but it doesn't have crispness of knickers.

Speaking of knickers, did you hear about the woman who sued Victoria's Secret because a metallic decoration popped off her thong and struck her in the eye? Not sure what ever came of that, but be careful out there, ladies!

Wednesday, January 27, 2010

Douchebag: Good or Bad?

I recently stumbled across this article, "In Defense of the Douchebag," a pithy little argument stating that since douchebags cause vaginal infections, it's perfectly okay to use the term as an insult.

Ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-HA! Excuse me while I roll around on the floor, LOL-ing.

We all know what a douchebag is. The boys who grow up into men calling each other douchebag as an insult did not pull it out of thin air: they must have heard it somewhere. I heard my brothers using it to insult each other before I even knew what it was; indeed, once I glommed onto what they were really selling on the Massengil commercials, I still had no idea about the true nature of douchebags, until I actually grew up and used one to wash out my vajayjay.

By the way, it comes in a bottle now, a soft squeeze bottle, so technically it should be douchebottle. But that doesn't have the same panache, now, does it?

Actually, it's not bad to douche once in a while. I don't do it anymore, but you know what, I do want to feel fresh sometimes. The only reason I stopped is because, well, it's really freaking cold. Who wants cold vinegar water squirted up their vajayjay? Raise your hands.

I, of all people, do not want to become the word police. But it would behoove you boys to remember where you came from. Everyone travels down the vajayjay to gain life. Did you think it was dirty then? No. And you probably didn't even know what a douchebag was until one of your friends called you the name. Then when you found out, you said, "ewwwww," in your head, and as such, it became the perfect insult. It's an insult all right. To your mother and the vajayjay that birthed you.

So, to each his own, but I do not use the word douchebag as a rule. The Vajayjay Guru can swear with the best of the truck drivers, but it's really something men call each other, and that's telling. I think they are afraid of the douchebag and anything surrounding the vajayjay. Don't worry, it won't bite. Vajayjays are very friendly, especially if you treat them properly.

Tuesday, January 26, 2010

Jennifer Love Hewitt's Sparkly Vajayjay

I mentioned Jennifer Love Hewitt's bedazzled vajayjay on Twitter this morning, and my first follower, @stevenblue, came up with the idea of working that into the plot line of Ghost Whisperer. He remarked that her jeweled vajayjay could be used to shine on spirits, sending them back into the light.

I think that's a pretty good idea. How about it, Ghost Whisperer writers? A little costume malfunction, or some discreetly thin panties with her skirt blowing up in a dramatic wind storm, and you could have a huge ratings boost!

Today's thought: just because you are a man, doesn't mean you can't follow The Vajayjay Way! Men are some of the biggest supporters of vajayjays, in my experience. @stevenblue is a fine example of that fact.

Monday, January 25, 2010

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